


Kilt

by Wulvercazz



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Bottom!Lucifer, Douchifer, Lucifer in a kilt, M/M, Office Sex, Pansexual Lucifer, Poor Dan, Porn Without Plot, Shameless PWP, Well a little plot, interrogation room sex?, top!dan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-10
Updated: 2017-10-10
Packaged: 2019-01-15 16:56:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12325077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wulvercazz/pseuds/Wulvercazz
Summary: Lucifer decides to try something new, it goes a lot better than expected; for him anyways.





	Kilt

**Author's Note:**

> I should be ashamed. But the world needs more douchifer and more bottom!Lucifer so I had to take one for the team

Lucifer had seen it on one of his lovers; Hanz had been lean but well built and had long legs that made the kilt look even better over his hips. Lucifer had loved it; so much easy access to all the best places. He hadn't lied, he never does, when he told the detective he was more of a leg man.

Maybe it was simple curiosity, he did love trying out new things (if there were any left) that he hadn't tried yet, as long as it wasn't an aberration to style; he did like to keep his appearance as perfect as humanly (angelically? devilishly?) possible.

That's how he found himself in the police station, wearing his newest addition and earning even more looks than usual (if that is even possible).

"Lucifer, good to know you're gracing us with your presence, I need you to-" Chloe had started once she saw him enter the place while she reviewed the case file a third time unsuccessfully; she stopped short when her eyes finally payed full attention to his partner. He was smiling smugly (a tiny bit smuggler than always) and wearing a skirt of all things.

"Do you like it Detective?~ I was already liking it the moment I decided on it but finding it a resounding success makes it quite a lot more enjoyable~" his hands gestured the piece of clothing and placed his hands on his hips, pulling the accompanying coat back and out of the way to show it off more clearly.

"As long as it doesn't get in the way of the case, I don't care; I don't know why it surprised me really." Chloe stated while returning to the file, her face a mixture of amused and annoyed at Lucifer's ...Luciferness. Mostly annoyed.

Lucifer could just frown slightly at not getting, once again, the reaction he expected from the detective; he was a bit more used to her freakishness now but it was still gravely dissatisfying.

"Chloe, I found the evidence you asked for, it was actually- Holy sh-"

Lucifer's smirk reappeared on his face as Detective Douche, Dan, came to view; this was the reaction he yearned for. His smile only grew when Dan's eyes seemed glued to his exposed thighs.

"My eyes are up here, Detective Douche~" he teased, earning a slightly flustered scoff from Dan as his eyes snapped back up to where Chloe was looking at him expectantly, and unamused.

Once Dan had gained back his control and not looked back at Lucifer's offensive, pale, soft-looking thighs, under that pleated kilt (that he swore was way shorter than needed be), Chloe and him discussed the case at hand. It was a particularly boring one, so Lucifer payed no attention to what they said, only catching a few key ideas; there was a murder, someone boring, and apparently it was related to money (these humans), they needed Lucifer's help because the crime scene had been too clean. Nothing too challenging, or entertaining even, and none of the suspects was particularly nice looking, or not old for that matter, but he'd promised Chloe he'd help, and well, he did want to keep on teasing Dan.

  
In the end, they had to go back to the crime scene, something about missing evidence, or trying to recreate something or other.

For once he followed Dan around instead of Chloe; which she was actually kind of glad about. One day of peace was a nice change, even if she did sometimes find him funny and his antics kind of endearing. (Not that she'd ever tell him, he had enough of an ego as it is).

She did hear Dan yelp once though, only to turn around and find Lucifer bending over to look intently at the evidence Ella was showing them; his face and ears red under the hand he was trying to cover his eyes with.

She wanted to feel sorry for Dan, but honestly, it was funny when Lucifer's lewd flirting wasn't directed at her. And Dan kinda deserved it, maybe he'd give her more credit for putting up with Lucifer when he actually experienced what having his attention fully on him felt like.

  
The day continued on like that, Dan hadn't yelped anymore but he kept on finding Lucifer and his stupid skirt always around him. And no matter how hard he tried to tell himself that he wasn't, he always found his eyes glued to the exposed skin.

He just wanted the day to end already, so he could go home to jack off or something. Clearly not because of Lucifer's skirt; just to relief some of his pent up tension. Obviously.

 

Later on, back at the police station, Lucifer had brought a confession out of a man with an apparent strong mid-crisis; killed his spouse's mother for money or something like that. As he'd said before, boring.

What wasn't boring, however, was listening to Dan's breath hitch the moment he bent slightly on the table at the precinct to use his talents to bring out the dirty, naughty secrets the suspect was hiding. Oh, he was enjoying this too much; he almost thanked Dad he had decided to stay regardless of the mind-numbingly boring case.

  
It was dark outside already when they were finally free, Chloe was thanking him for a job well done while he couldn't hold back the useless flirtations.

"It is probably all thanks to the freedom On my-" Lucifer had started, once again motioning to the kilt.

"No. I don't want to hear it." Chloe closed her eyes unamused, until she opened them back up, huge in realisation. "Wait. What exactly are you wearing under that."

She already knew the answer, but for once she really wished she was wrong.

"Nothing, of course, how else are you supposed to wear a kilt?" He responded as if saying the sky was blue. It would've made Chloe's eyes to roll annoyedly, if the sound of Dan choking on his coffee hadn't caught her attention.

"Careful, Dan, don't choke... just swallow~" Lucifer added as Chloe tried to help her ex husband to get back to breathing normally.

He just threw him an unamused glare; Chloe did too.

"Just stop sabotaging each other" Chloe said right before leaving, and right after mentioning how she expected them to behave like adults or something of that matter.

"Well, this has been way bett-" Lucifer had started once Chloe was out of sight, but was cut short when Dan took hold of his expensive suit and pushed him towards the nearest wall; his nose almost touching Lucifer's.

"Ooh, I didn't have that much effect on you, Dan, did I?"

"What did you do to me? Did you roofie me or something?!" Detective Espinoza asked, exasperated.

"I most certainly did not!" Lucifer started, his face turning slightly taken aback and offended at the suggestions; however it quickly returned to its flirty demeanour, "You're merely reacting to me Detective, it's normal, really, for you humans to react to me that way~"

Dan would've scoffed if the pressure increasing in his pants hadn't been as distracting. He almost hadn't payed much attention to their positions, just how close his body was to Lucifer's; he had to have roofied him or something, because the feeling of their chests barely pressing together was making his heart beat faster and his cock twitch lightly in anticipation.

"Oh, Devil got your tongue?~" Lucifer continued at Dan's dazed look and blown pupils, "I'm always up for office sex, Detective~ While not quite an office I'm sure the interrogation room will do just nicely~" he finished, eyeing said room tauntingly and smirking at Dan.

He knew that look, the one on the Detective's face, oh, did Dan want it. He was just debating whether or not he should give in to his desire; Lucifer could help with that.

"I'm sure you've been thinking about it all day, but I wouldn't mind to remind you~" Lucifer taunted once more as his fingers lightly trailed down from the Detective's elbow, down to his hand (which had dropped from the lapels on his coat mere seconds ago) and grabbed his wrist lightly. Firmly, yet softly, the Devil guided the Detective's wrist to place the other's hand on the exposed skin of his thigh.

Dan tensed up immediately, his eyes shifting between Lucifer's own and his mouth and everywhere else, only stopping to look into Lucifer's dark ones when the civilian consultant let his free hand hold Dan's waist and the other trail back up his arm to rest his hand on his nape.

"Go ahead, Detective," he said, softer, a small teasing smirk dancing in his lips, showing off his dimples, "tell me what you want~"

"I..," Dan gasped, "I want to bend you over the interrogation table, flip that offensive skirt of yours over and fuck you quiet."

Dan immediately flushed and looked away, confused as to why he had said such thing out loud, but not yet breaking apart from the man under him.

"Well, well, Detective, you're making me blush~" Lucifer's little smirk grew wider as he slipped easily off the other man's grip and as easily entered the interrogation room; which Dan had been sure was actually locked.

"Well, do come in~ What're you waiting for?" The Devil called and all Dan could do was let his feet guide him to the man that annoyed him the most. And turned him on the most too now, apparently.

"Yes, that's it, now what were you saying just a few seconds ago? I think something along the li-" His face was suddenly against the cold metal of the table. To be honest, Dan had actually caught him off guard.

"You talk to much," Dan almost growled into Lucifer's ear as he leaned over him.

"Hmm, Detective, do something about it, then~" he teased, purposefully arching his back; his kilt-covered ass pressing into the other man's erection, earning him a nearly stifled groan.

"I'm gonna set the pacing here," Dan threatened into his ear once more.

Before Lucifer could even think of yet another remark, Dan stood back up from him and lifted the kilt swiftly, as promised, and gave a firm slap on one of his cheeks.

While it didn't sting, or hurt even in the least, the press and mostly the intention Dan put behind it send some thrill along Lucifer's spine. Sure there'd been times he'd bottomed before, but they'd been scarce.

"Detective~! Feeling kinky, now aren't we?" He smirked, he was enjoying Dan's sudden audacity.

The Detective, however, seemed too entranced to listen to the remarks; he let his hands take hold of each of the Devil's globes, spreading them open.

"You like the view~?" Lucifer tainted once more.

"Shut." Dan took a fistful of Lucifer's hair on one hand, "Up." He ended as his index and middle fingers thrusted themselves unforgivingly into Luci's mouth; which the Devil sucked on wilfully.

Lucifer almost purred at the sudden aggressiveness from the Detective; who knew the usually boring douche had this dirty, naughty side of him?

Lucifer bucked his hips up and against Dan's crotch in appreciation, receiving a rather pleasing groan from the Detective.

"You just can't stop trying to mess with me, can you?" Dan said with no hint of the usual annoyance in his tone, as he removed his now wet fingers and pushed the tip of the first in gently but firmly into Lucifer.

"Hmmm~ Detective," Lucifer turned to look at Dan, straight in the eye, "have you ever had sex with a man before this?" He asked teasingly, yet actually curious.

Dan found himself tied once more to the Devil's mojo, "No, but I watch gay porn from time to time."

Lucifer couldn't help to bark a laugh, which brought Dan back from the daze and into a flustered mess. "Oh, shut up. You of all people can't blame me."

"No no, au contraire, Daniel. I'm pleased to hear that~ It's not exactly a good source of information of real penetrative man on man sex, but I'm immortal; now that The Detective is gone at least~" Lucifer chattered with a small teasing smile.

"You talk too much." Dan reminded, and took no time to let the tip of his finger probe into Lucifer.

"Hmm, come on Daniel, I already said you can't hurt me, why the tentativeness all of a sudden~?" Lucifer continued nevertheless; arching his back shamelessly.

"I said," Dan pushed his fingers in, "Shut." He leaned in again, so his lips were right next to Luci's right ear, "Up."

"Mmmm," Lucifer purred with a devilish smile, he should have tried this a long time ago.

Dan pumped his fingers in and out of Lucifer, sometimes curling and scissoring; the Devil couldn't help but moan in frustration at Dan's teasing pace.

"Come on Daniel, immortal." He reminded.

"Yeah, yeah, I heard you," Dan smirked back, curling his fingers once more, slowly and pressing against the Devil's prostate, "I just don't care" he finished, breathing right into his ear.

Lucifer' breath hitched for the first time that day; the good thing about being immortal was that while he couldn't feel pain, he could very much feel pleasure. Although maybe right now it was a bit too much; Dan was taking his damned time. For someone who looked so desperate he was a master of control; and maybe just a bit of a sadist.

"Dan..." Lucifer warned, pushing his hips back, trying to get the message across.

The detective just chuckled, almost maliciously, "oh no, you've been teasing me all day," he pushed a third finger in, "I'm going to take my time to enjoy it now."

Lucifer couldn't help the moan-y growl that escaped his throat; he was sure if he'd been in control of the situation, he would've found it incredibly hot, but he was not. While he teased Dan into horniness throughout the day, he'd made himself horny too. He wanted this. And Dan was denying it to the Devil himself.

Dan curled his fingers once more, pressing into Lucifer's prostate and sending a shiver along his spine, his legs shivering slightly.

"Fuck," Lucifer squeezed his eyes shut, he wanted more, dammit. Bloody Detective Douche taking his sweet, sweet time to-

"Oh, Hell yes!" His stream of thought was interrupted when he felt Dan finally press the tip to his crack. Teasing.

"Come on, Daniel! Enough with the teasing will you?" Lucifer pressed, "I know you want it as much as I do~"

"I said," Dan finally let the tip of his cock rub on Lucifer's entrance, "Shut." He let his chest rest against Lucifer's back, "Up." He finished as he finally pushed into him.

"Ah! B-Bloody hell" Lucifer continued, as chatty as ever, Dan was going to change that, he was sure of it.

When he finally bottomed out, Dan let out a breath he'd been holding in for a while.

"Come now Detective, how about you show me wh-" Lucifer continued his relentless chatter, until Dan had enough and swiftly pulled back almost all the way and back in, successfully taking the words out of The Devil's mouth.

"That's much better," Dan smirked, and huffed out a breath right into Lucifer's ear.

"You've been a pain in the ass all day," Dan breathed out as he continued to thrust into The King of Hell, "let me return the favour."

He didn't let Lucifer think of anything smart to snap back, as he raised himself and took Lucifer's kilt-clad hips with firm hands to make his thrusts stronger, deeper. His own hips slapping against Lucifer's ass, pushing him just the slightest with each thrust.

From The Devil's lips, small huffs escaped, almost as gasps; mostly from the impacts rather than exhaustion. He was the Devil after all, even if Detective Espinoza did prove to be a quite decent lover. And a quite decent amount of stamina, which Lucifer had to admit, was quite impressive, even for the King of Hell himself.

His hands made their way to his still untouched cock, or at least tried, as Dan took no time to transfer the hands hold his hips in a warm grip down to his sneaky wrists. "Oh, no, you're coming on my dick," Dan promised between pants.

An almost surprised expression appeared on Lucifer's face, only to change back to a pleasured grin as a throaty moan escaped his lips, "Daniel, is that a promise~?"

"You tell me," The Detective taunted right before continuing his assault; his hips stuttering slightly as he edged, and he would've gone over the board if Lucifer hadn't let a deeper, groany-er, more instinctive moan at that shift of his hips.

He stopped almost entirely, changing his angle drastically; he wanted to hear that again, god, it had been such a mouth-watering sound, ' _delicious_ ' even. He'd heard Lucifer use that word about his lovers before, and while at the moment it had creeped him out a little bit, fuck, did he get it now.

He needed to hear it. So much more. And Lucifer was trying, oh so bad to contain the sounds, never one to hold back to pleasure no, but because Daniel had _shaken_ with lust. He was going to make him work harder.

When Dan pulled out though, Lucifer almost protested, only to be turned on his back and have Daniel in him once more, chest to chest. Not a trace of shame in him, looking at the Devils deep, dark eyes as he held onto his bare thighs, and pummelled into the guy he had hated so much. The guy who also saved his ex-wife several times, and his daughter. And now teased and taunted and turned him on like he hadn't been since he was a teenager.

He kissed Lucifer once more; it was almost like fighting, they were good at that. Daniel was relentless, to the point where Lucifer felt the groan on his throat as much as he did Daniel's tongue. The Detective could help but chuckle, and buck harder and the prompt of the sound he wanted to hear.

"Come on Luce, be loud for me" Dan said as he bucked once more; Lucifer couldn't remember the last time he lost control of his reactions in the sack. He knew when to moan, when to shudder, when to roll his hips. He was the one usually carrying the show, even when he bottomed. This was delightful.

Lucifer did not disappoint, he moaned, loud, and throaty and deep. And he took hold of the Detective's nape with one arm and his bicep with the other, "Dan!" he groaned one last time, and Daniel Espinoza came undone.

He came in spasms inside of the Devil, still pumping into him with the same force; and Lucifer let out another moan as his orgasm came to him too, was ripped from him.

Dan panted heavily, his only support being his hands splayed on both sides of the interrogation table, and his clothed chest still pressed hard to Lucifer's.

"Well, well, Daniel, now I know what the Detective saw on you~" he taunted in a soft voice, not as out of breath as Dan believed he should be, "I'll definitely keep it in mind~"

 

 

 


End file.
